It doesn't get easier the longer I'm away but I wouldn't say it gets any worse either. The longer I'm away from family and friends the more I think about the details of what makes me happy when I'm around them.
Going for a ride with my dad... with no particular place to go.
Talking with my mom... and disagreeing about politics.
Punching my sister... not very hard. Brotherly love.
Stopping by Grandma's unexpectedly... just to visit. And hoping she has some sweetbread.
The Amaro's barn... no matter what kind of mood I was in I left with a smile and a helping of happiness.
Throwing horseshoes with the boys... just wish they could beat me once in awhile.
I miss the comradre of my friends. I miss the ease of a summer night and the smell of fresh cut grass. You're all never more than just a skype call away and it's always great to hear your voices. I miss you.
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Thursday, March 17, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Drove My Chevy to the Levee
A month just dissipated before my very eyes. Like the exhale on a frost covered morning. The month floated off, twisitng in the winter silence.
February has brought a lot for me to contemplate. I guess it's just like any other day or month. Everyday brings new experiences, fresh views, and complex questions. But unlike what Don McLean sang in his song 'American Pie', February didn't make me shiver. It brought me closer to my center, closer to my contentment. But I still have many mountains to climb.
To sum up my February in a few words... We all should be aware of the future and the inevitable change it will bring and the lessons of the past. But living and life happen now. I will prepare myself for tomorrow by embracing today.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
The Weather
I phoned myself today and had a great conversation about tomorrow.
Most Californians understand that they're spoiled in the winter months. The mercury seldom drops below freezing. There are periods of spring like conditions in the middle of January. It can even trick the trees into an early bloom.
In most parts of California there is a reprieve from winter. Not so much in Korea. When the sun is out, the air still stings. Gloves are a necessity, not just a comfort. If you're caught outside for an extended period with uncovered ears... expect an ache. Well insulated footwear is a must. (and something I should invest in.)
These are no secrets to the multitudes of people who actually experience a true winter year after year. Even myself, a native Californian, could grasp the idea of what a four month winter could feel like. But now here I am in month number 3 and I'm ready for my reprieve. And just think, this weather is mild compared to what friends of mine from Alaska, Colorado, and Ohio have to put up with.
Most Californians understand that they're spoiled in the winter months. The mercury seldom drops below freezing. There are periods of spring like conditions in the middle of January. It can even trick the trees into an early bloom.
In most parts of California there is a reprieve from winter. Not so much in Korea. When the sun is out, the air still stings. Gloves are a necessity, not just a comfort. If you're caught outside for an extended period with uncovered ears... expect an ache. Well insulated footwear is a must. (and something I should invest in.)
These are no secrets to the multitudes of people who actually experience a true winter year after year. Even myself, a native Californian, could grasp the idea of what a four month winter could feel like. But now here I am in month number 3 and I'm ready for my reprieve. And just think, this weather is mild compared to what friends of mine from Alaska, Colorado, and Ohio have to put up with.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
The Corner
I stand at the corner. The man flashes red. The low dull rays of the winter sun do little to warm my face against the stinging winds. I'm bombarded with crystalized water. Every swirling seige impales my face. Cars zoom by, their cargo protected from the chill for the time being. Delivery boys on their scooters cut through the traffic, but the cold cuts through them.
I stand at the corner. The man still flashes red. The mighty sun has lost this battle. It can not excite the atoms. The frigid grip of old man winter has slowed time itself. Pain is emanated from the creeking and screeching of every turning vehicle. Their brake pads sound brittle and controted. Buses lumber along like aging old men.
Red lights never use to be so cold when you were standing next to me. Your body pressed against mine did what the sun tried in vain. As much as I may have wanted time to stand still... as tight as winter squeezed... we couldn't stop the red man from flashing green.
I stand at the corner. The man still flashes red. The mighty sun has lost this battle. It can not excite the atoms. The frigid grip of old man winter has slowed time itself. Pain is emanated from the creeking and screeching of every turning vehicle. Their brake pads sound brittle and controted. Buses lumber along like aging old men.
Red lights never use to be so cold when you were standing next to me. Your body pressed against mine did what the sun tried in vain. As much as I may have wanted time to stand still... as tight as winter squeezed... we couldn't stop the red man from flashing green.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Older
What is it about getting older? I assume most people begin to reminisce about past achievements and failures and how they wish they could go back and change a thing here or there. I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about that once in awhile. But then it isn't very constructive second guessing your decisions and living in the past. Plus, I have a different bone to pick with getting older.
Why can I not sleep in anymore? Seriously! What chemical in my brain decided to switch on within the last few months that has disabled my slumber mode? Today for instance. It's a Saturday morning, right around ten. This would've been a perfect time to wake up after falling asleep around 1am. (Had to watch 6 episodes of the Inbetweeners! Good show)
But instead, I've been tossing and turning in my bed since 5:30am. And the only reason I haven't gotten out of bed yet is because I have principles! But now I'm just getting bored and I guess I need to get outside and make something of my weekend. I can already hear my dad's voice, "Quit sleeping your life away!"
No chance in that happening. I haven't been able to sleep my life away since I got here. Maybe it's a gene from our prehistoric ancestors? Something to do with survival? At 32 I'd have been an elder statesman in my band of hairy, stone-tooled, hunch-backed relatives. I would've needed the ability to wake up earlier then my younger counterparts in order to secure my food for the day. That has to be it!
"Quit sleeping your life away!" That reminds me of another saying my dad had. "Wake up and meet the sun half-way." As a teenager, needing copious amounts of sleep, I would point-out to my dad, at 6am, that meeting the sun half way, could actually mean meeting the sun when it was halfway done with its day. Noon. He didn't by it, but it made perfect sense to me. I don't wanna sleep my life away or even meet the sun half way, but I would like the ability, again, to enjoy a few extra hours of sleep on a weekend.
I don't mind getting older. If approached correctly, you'll actually mature and grow as a person and become less of an egocentric twat. I just hope the change in personal and worldviews doesn't go hand in hand with hearing loss and bed wetting.
Why can I not sleep in anymore? Seriously! What chemical in my brain decided to switch on within the last few months that has disabled my slumber mode? Today for instance. It's a Saturday morning, right around ten. This would've been a perfect time to wake up after falling asleep around 1am. (Had to watch 6 episodes of the Inbetweeners! Good show)
But instead, I've been tossing and turning in my bed since 5:30am. And the only reason I haven't gotten out of bed yet is because I have principles! But now I'm just getting bored and I guess I need to get outside and make something of my weekend. I can already hear my dad's voice, "Quit sleeping your life away!"
No chance in that happening. I haven't been able to sleep my life away since I got here. Maybe it's a gene from our prehistoric ancestors? Something to do with survival? At 32 I'd have been an elder statesman in my band of hairy, stone-tooled, hunch-backed relatives. I would've needed the ability to wake up earlier then my younger counterparts in order to secure my food for the day. That has to be it!
"Quit sleeping your life away!" That reminds me of another saying my dad had. "Wake up and meet the sun half-way." As a teenager, needing copious amounts of sleep, I would point-out to my dad, at 6am, that meeting the sun half way, could actually mean meeting the sun when it was halfway done with its day. Noon. He didn't by it, but it made perfect sense to me. I don't wanna sleep my life away or even meet the sun half way, but I would like the ability, again, to enjoy a few extra hours of sleep on a weekend.
I don't mind getting older. If approached correctly, you'll actually mature and grow as a person and become less of an egocentric twat. I just hope the change in personal and worldviews doesn't go hand in hand with hearing loss and bed wetting.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
December
December has rushed by faster than a Brian Wilson four seam fastball (WORLD SERIES CHAMPS!)
*Yea, I'm still excited about that one!
Work is a continuous joy and so are my students. Don't get me wrong... there are days that they drive me batty, but that's to be expected. Work really doesn't feel so much like work. I enjoy preparing my lessons... I enjoy helping my students develop a second language. I've said it before, but I know that teaching is what I need to do. Whether it's in Korea, the States, or anywhere else.
My birthday came and went in a flash. I spent it with a few friends. We went to what we thought was going to be a huge German festival, but it turned out to be five tents, a skinny santa, some sausages, and hot wine. Not even saurkraut?! What kind of German festival is that? I had half a mind to start a book burning party. Ok, yes, that joke may be in bad taste...
Nonetheless it was a good time with friends huddled around a propane heater sharing a drink and a powdered sugar sprinkled waffle.
Thailand! Christmas! It's only three days away! I'm looking forward to Bangkok and exploring the city, temples and local fare. But my heart and mind are really set on Phuket and Naki Island! Away from the hustle and bustle I will slip into a blissful state in which I will not want to return from.
December tried to sneak past me... but it didn't go unnoticed. It's been an amazing month. One that will be with me for the rest of my days. The days and nights may be bitterly cold but the snow still melts underneath my every step.
*Yea, I'm still excited about that one!
Work is a continuous joy and so are my students. Don't get me wrong... there are days that they drive me batty, but that's to be expected. Work really doesn't feel so much like work. I enjoy preparing my lessons... I enjoy helping my students develop a second language. I've said it before, but I know that teaching is what I need to do. Whether it's in Korea, the States, or anywhere else.
My birthday came and went in a flash. I spent it with a few friends. We went to what we thought was going to be a huge German festival, but it turned out to be five tents, a skinny santa, some sausages, and hot wine. Not even saurkraut?! What kind of German festival is that? I had half a mind to start a book burning party. Ok, yes, that joke may be in bad taste...
Nonetheless it was a good time with friends huddled around a propane heater sharing a drink and a powdered sugar sprinkled waffle.
Thailand! Christmas! It's only three days away! I'm looking forward to Bangkok and exploring the city, temples and local fare. But my heart and mind are really set on Phuket and Naki Island! Away from the hustle and bustle I will slip into a blissful state in which I will not want to return from.
December tried to sneak past me... but it didn't go unnoticed. It's been an amazing month. One that will be with me for the rest of my days. The days and nights may be bitterly cold but the snow still melts underneath my every step.
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